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From today's featured article [Feature an article]

Mrs. God's blog is republished from Facebook with permission of the author.

Hiiiii!

Just a few words from me, Mrs God. I know you haven’t heard from me much over the years, but now that my hubby’s away…

First of all, let me reassure everyone – “God is not dead”. We heard a lot of that in the 60s. It wasn’t true then and it’s not true now. Phew!

It IS true that He picked up a bit of a coke habit – and I can tell you, God moved in some peculiar ways back then. But we’ve finally persuaded Him to face His issues and booked Him into Rehab – He said “No, no, no” for thirty years and when God says “No” it’s very hard to change His mind but He's finally checked into the Priory and we're hoping He can work through some of His issues and make a full recovery. (Full article...)

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Did you know... [edit]

... that Gerry Adams IS the Lord of the Dance? (Pictured)

... that Uncyclopedia is riddled with subliminal messages? DRINK COCA COLA
... that Bruce Lee could juggle two balls with his penis?
... that Calvin and Hobbes was an action-packed buddy comedy series that ran from 1542-1549, featuring philosophers John Calvin and Thomas Hobbes as themselves?
... that ten out of ten cigarette manufacturers agree that Cancer is great?
... that Witch-Hunting For Fun and Profit has mostly turned into Witch-Hunting For Fun in this modern era of cheaply produced Chinese assembly line witches?
... that while most Popes don't shit in the woods, sometimes bears are Catholic?
... that Iran is all set to invade itself?

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In the news [edit]

Trump sends condolences to tough-guy actor "Mikey Madison" (Pictured)
Clint Eastwood announces plans to live forever
Trumpman introduces Trumpmobile
Diddy gets off easy, possibly due to bribing jury
Musk establishes "Porky Pig Party" to combat Trump's "Big Beautiful Bill"
United Nations Secretary General gives up on world peace, World War Three begins
Netanyahu and Khamenei get it on
- Trump joins in for threesome, blows load
- Khamenei fails to follow up after dirty talk, taps out
Elon Musk breaks up with Trump
Trump sends condolences to "Sly Stallone"
Trump celebrates TACO Wednesday by reversing course on long-held campaign promise
THE ROCKIES HAVE WON A SERIES!

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Animal-related live-action remakes kicking Snow White's ass • Jaws 50th anniversary • Colorado Rockies game replacing Jaws airing • Israel/Iran "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk)

Recent deaths: Ariana Grande's Nonna • Canadian team's bid to win the Stanley Cup, again • PF4Eva's headphone cable • Jimmy Swaggart • Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael Madsen • Diogo Jota • Texas flood victims

Upcoming deaths: DEI • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • Greta Thunberg? • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Dumbasses with fireworks in their backyards • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid Game

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On this day [edit]

July 10: International Bathroom Stall Graffiti Day

1796 – Carl Friedrich Gauss discovers that every positive integer is representable as a sum of at most three triangular numbers, yet he remains steadfastly confounded by other number-shapes such as the octagonal numbers and the irritating square pi.
1821 – The United States takes possession of its newly bought territory of Florida from Spain. The state instantly becomes recognized for its oranges, old people, hurricanes, and other stereotypes, except for Disney World which was not constructed until 1875.
1938 – Diabolical billionaire Howard Hughes sets a new record by completing a 91 hour flight around the world in just 87 hours.
2005 – Microsoft decides to remove the "Undo" button from all its programs, "for customer convenience".
2006 – Realizing their mistake in the previous year, Microsoft tries to fix the problem, yet is unable to Undo the mistake due to the lack of a button enabling this process.
2007 – On the anniversary of its acquisition by the United States, Florida is flooded while ironically leaving Sea World above water (pictured).

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Picture of the day

In order to quell the ongoing strife in the Mideast, the Canadian government has elected to send their elite peacekeeping forces into Afghanistan, Iraq and Mos Eisley.

Image credit: NewMess1ah
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